A-salted with an over seasoned bagel.

(Warning: yucky, health-related stuff ahead. Yup, here there be phlegm!)

After a ’bout with the flu and spending 3.5 days straight in bed (literally), I thought I was all better. I wanted very much to believe it, because, well, it’s faux-spring in DC: 70F and freakishly sunny. No one wants to be sick in faux-spring. My nose wasn’t running anymore, just jogging languidly and I no longer had a fever, but no matter how much Nyquil I swilled or Tylenol PM I knocked back or how many Halls’ I sucked I just couldn’t stop coughing. And talking like Rod Stewart. Not in a “do ya think I’m sexy” way, but in a “croaky old guy” way- my throat didn’t hurt, it just wasn’t working properly.

So I went to the doctor and he stuck a camera up my nose and down my throat and told me I had a sinus infection, which would be cleared up with some horse pills. Yum. He also told me my vocal chords were tired from all the slamming around. “Ah, I guess I should skip the hog calling contest this weekend, then?” I asked.

“No, just stop coughing,” he said. Um, yeah. Okay. I’ll just tell the mucus to stay put then?

Anyway, the horse pills (which can cause nausea and vomiting) need to be taken with food (oh, the irony is delicious!). So, this morning I went to the local deli to grab a bite to eat with my morning horse pill. The special for the day was a bagel with lox or a pb&j on toast with bananas. I went for the lox.

When I ordered the guy told me to get my own bagel from a bin off to the side. I picked a salt bagel because I really wasn’t sure what the others were (raisin? oat? chocolate chip?). It was pretty thickly crusted with salt crystals, but I figured after it had been manhandled a bit by the sandwich maker it would be less so.

I poked around the deli for a bit- investigated the smoothie bar, marveled at the selection of Ritter bars, chips, and other yummies- picked a bottle of tea, then went back to pick up my sandwich. When I got back to my office I pulled out the tea, grabbed the pill bottle, and unwrapped the bagel sammich and took a bite.

And drained half a bottle of Arizona Ice Tea because my bagel was still wearing a thick coat of salt. Because I picked a salt bagel. Because I was afraid the lox wouldn’t be salty enough. Urgh. Coughing followed. Lots of it. I managed to rub most of it off with my fingers, so now I’m sitting in salt. I’ve been a-salted. Officially. There’s enough salt on my desk that I could gargle it with a little hot water.

(Ew.)

Darn good bagel for DC, though.

In the time I’ve been “away” I’ve found a few neat-o things on iTunes to share:

A podcast called “Underbelly” hosted by Baron Ambrosia is great fun (make sure you have Quicktime for that one). The Baron doesn’t take himself too seriously, which is lucky since he swans around looking like Gary Oldman in “Dracula” dressed by Johnny Depp’s costumer in “Chocolate Factory.” Yikes. The guy has a sense of humor and is passionate about food, ‘nuf said.

Although I’ve mentioned it before, The Spendid Tableis worth another mention because, well, they’re now broadcasting the entire show and not just the call-in part. Which gives us children of the 70’s ample opportunity to plumb the wisdom of the Sterns (“Road Food”).

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3 responses to “A-salted with an over seasoned bagel.

  1. >I was just wondering how you were doing and why no blogging recently. Thanks for the update, even though it does make me miss American bagels!

  2. >this is an odd odd question, I’ve been trying to find a good ‘salt bagel’ for a while. Where might one procure this tasty product?

  3. >Hey Christopher,I get mine at Daily Market in DC. It’s 2 or 3 doors down from the K St exit of the Farragut North Metro on Connecticut.If you’re driving, you want Connecticut and K St and then you want a Valium, you brave person you!They also make wikkid good smoothies!Cheers!Liz

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